Gloria's birthday is next week.
Last year her aunt--Tante Louisa--did something special and baked her a cake.
Usually, she just gave her 20 euros enclosed in a birthday card.
Tante Louisa gave her a birthday card, too, but included only €15.74, subtracting, item by item (writing out the math in the card, of course), the amount for the cake ingredients.
Landman got into an argument with a patron the other night. The customer--who we can flat out state was dead drunk-- picked up an empty glass, examined it, raised it high above his head, and threw his arm down, sending the glass crashing to the floor.
Landman--whom we can also flat out state was dead drunk--has a policy against customers smashing glasses on the floor. He screamed at the man, telling him no customer was allowed to break glasses in his establishment.
Landman then summoned the waitress, who brought him a glass, which he took in his very large hand, and smashed to bits on the floor.
"I'm the only one who can smash glasses on the floor at the Landman Cafe!"
Went to Budapest last week to interview a guy for a story.
On the way back, I stopped at the gas station to top up the tank. Inside, the 50-something clerk was perusing some of the reading material on offer--which, at least on this particular "spread"--included lots of close-up penis photos, vagina photos, and various helpful other photos displaying the myriad of possibilities of where to put what.
Gives new meaning to the phrase "Fill 'Er Up."
European English. Imagine my surprise: "I punctuated my tire this morning. Can you ride me home?"
